Lovework

My wife’s grandma gave us an advice on our wedding day. In English it goes something like this: “Don’t go to sleep when you are angry.” It is a good and solid advice. The essence of the advice is that we, as a married couple, should not go to sleep before we have agreed any quarrels we have.

I wish that I could say that we have always followed it. I can’t. For years we did, and it meant a lot of work. It sometimes takes hours to talk things through. And it’s worth it as making up has been always the best part of any argument we have.

But sometimes I am, or we are, just too tired. So we go to sleep. I never sleep well in nights like those and I know she doesn’t either. And in the morning we say we are sorry and that it feels bad and that we love.

Maybe it is the strength of our love that allows us to go to sleep feeling bad or mad. I still hope that we will have strength to follow the advice better. It is those hours of talk that strengthens our love.